a healthy addiction

Sometimes when I sit down to write I have no idea what I am going to say. Today is one of those days.

When I started this blog it was an evening thing, someone other than Zacchi to chat to when my brain had turned to custard in the language immersion. But it has become an addiction, an essential part of my day, and therefore a morning thing. My excuse is that I now study in the evenings. I lie to myself; it is quite simply that the thought of a day without writing is too much to contemplate. I am addicted.

I am not entirely sure that it is healthy.

I have a few addictions. This morning I haven't checked Scrabulous, because other things are more pressing. I am thrilled about that, because Scrabulous had become an addiction.

Emails can be an addiction too. That is a harder one to monitor, because I do want to stay in touch with family and friends, and in my "taking a break" time it is always to the computer I go, bowl of tea in hand to help or hinder. Now that I have skype it is worse, because I don't turn the computer off very often. It is my telephone, and yes sometimes (not often) it rings. But when I stay up too late, or get up at 3am to check, just in case someone has emailed from a different time zone, that is an unhealthy addiction.

Guilty, and working on it.

Physical fitness is an addiction too. No one would say that that is harmful. But it can be. (Why on earth did I write that? I need to think some more). Yes, if pursuing physical fitness is hiding an obsession with burning calories for image control, it can be an addiction covering a disorder. If it is a way of blocking out things that need to be dealt with, then that, long term, is not healthy. (I have become completely stuck with this line of thinking. Let's leave it there. But enough to say that my chocolate eating addiction has no bearing at all on my fitness routine).

Is chocolate another of my addictions? Yes and no. Mostly no. Cocoa is an antidepressant, and that is more likely where my addiction to the lovely stuff started. That feel-good thing. I can go weeks without chocolate, but when the chips are down, chocolate is a girl's best friend. I ate a whole box of Mon Cheri when I had the flu. Happily I can report that the second box is not going down nearly so fast! If chocolate is an addiction for me, then it is a well qualified one. I am very fussy about the particular chocolates I am addicted to!

Caffeine is certainly an addiction I admit to; too many days without a cup of tea and I get headaches. And I live in a society that runs on caffeine and sugar. Interestingly enough, on television there are all the health programmes we associate, with all due respect, with overweight Americans and Pacific Islanders. Weight, in the time I have been watching television here, has gone from being a fashion and image issue to a health issue. It certainly needed to. While proportionately there may not be so many overweight Italians, the size of the problem for individuals (pun intended) is equal to any I have seen in New Zealand.

I am missing going to the gym. I was almost addicted to it. Pity about the "almost". It just isn't convenient at the moment, with work happening in the house, my gym partner deciding she doesn't want to go at all, the cost of petrol making it an extravagance if I think too hard about that, all those things. But mostly, I still feel a bit fragile after the flu. The effort to get through my exhibition opening over a week ago was huge. Kick-starting myself every day is a bit of a mission. My body is saying rest, sleep, keep the shutters closed.

So what did this post end up being about?

All my dear southern hemisphere friends, going into Autumn, do make sure you get your flu jabs. This is the first year I haven't had one, leaving NZ before they were available last year, and the flu was a real pain, quite literally, in my spine, my neck, my shoulders, my hips. If you want an addiction, make it to flu vaccinations. Life is far too short to spend it lying in bed feeling sorry for yourself.

Too much time, energy, and optimism was stolen from me. But today is another day (freezing cold one, but still a new one) and I am addicted to being up!

I have a lot of making up to do!