need over want

As I unpacked my odd assortment of "treasures" that made it safely from NZ to Italy I thought about how generous people are. In NZ I sorted things I wont need in the foreseeable future and wondered who to give them to, whether or not I should sell them, where they would be most useful. Some it was hard to let go, and others survived for another round of selection. Some, in fact, that I expected to be easy to give away, proved to be difficult to find homes for. Sometimes I found it difficult balancing my in-built caution (I might need that one day) with my wish to give things a new home.

I am not as generous as I would like to be. I found that my attitude to parting with things was much helped when daughter number one said "Think of how much pleasure that will give someone". I was thinking only of myself, keeping what I might need, and giving out of a wish to be charitable rather than in a true spirit of giving.

Today (my time) it is 21 years since my brother died. One of our last conversations was centred around his view that "no one person should have too much money". He was right. Increasingly I think no one person should have too many possessions either. Research now shows that where there is a more equitable distribution of material wealth then both the wealthy and the poorer benefit in many unexpected ways.

I had two wonderful grandmothers, a minimalist and a hoarder. I take after the hoarder. After two world wars and the great depression I imagine that she had an excuse to save everything for the future. I have no excuse. It is time to pass things on, even gifts that have been given to me but are no longer things I need. The other grandmother, who left her few possessions neatly ordered and ready to be gifted when she left this world, apparently asked her children "Do you need this?" and if they hesitated before replying it was gone.

I have received generous and unexpected kindnesses and gifts. One friend said "I love giving gifts, it's paying goodwill forward and it's as simple as that". How wonderful are her words, "it's as simple as that"! The next time I think "Can I afford to give this away?" I will try to remember the joy of giving and put my instincts to store for the future well away from me. When I do have regrets about things I haven't kept the regrets don't last too long.

Now, what can I give away to make room for my assorted bits and pieces? Zacchi, Pickle... (just kidding Sally!)

Today I am grateful for having enough.