any old name will do

How important is a name? Do names inspire trust, engender fear, shape character, tell our story?

When I was a child I wanted to change my name. There were at least three names I preferred to mine. My mother told me that she had chosen the name Leigh for me, but didn't use it when my aunt gave it to a slightly older cousin first. I felt a little cheated, somehow.

My father-in-law could never get my name right. The first time we met he called me by the name of my then fiance's previous girlfriend. In later years (until he latched onto "OK Kay") I became (fondly I hope) "Fay-Kay-Gay or whatever your name is". Many a time I have had to answer to Ann, Jan, Sue... so finally I said "if it is polite,and of one syllable, I will answer..."

In Italy my name is a problem. Kay, as in "che", means "what?" There I answer to Katia, Catia, Cat, Kayeee, Kie, and Katie. I wish I had adopted Katia or Katie as soon as I arrived in Italy.

I remember at a graduation ceremony searching the programme for the name of a young friend... only to find that his real name was not at all what I knew him as. He had simply adopted an English name and changed the spelling of his surname when he enrolled at school.

I'm really not at all sure what I would like to be called. Does a name really matter?

Shakespeare's father signed with an X, although he was literate. Shakespeare himself used various spellings of his name, interestingly not any one of them was written "Shakespeare" as we know it now.

I once worked with immigrant children from a family who had named them all, in their own language, One, Two, Three, and Four. Now that's something to ponder!

Today I am grateful for tolerance.