thinking out loud

Sunday morning. I am determined to finish this today, for better or worse.(The painting is not so blue, the camera picks up colours differently and the grey is less apparent in the photos. I mix my own greys, hence the difference. A diluted black, which I never ever use, would photograph well but would look dead in the painting).

Looking at it now I realise that I should have taken more time to think about how to use the flaw in the paper rather than fight it. Probably the best thing to do would have been chop it up into little abstract works, and use them as gift labels.

But I have invested too much energy in this now, and will re-evaluate how to produce something I am satisfied with, hopefully without going into mixed media.

Now that the work is dry (almost dry, the paper is like a cardboard so will still hold some damp even in this heat) I can try various options. I have used a few staining colours, so it would be interesting to scrub the work under running water and see what I am left with. I am not sure how the paper would handle that. Contrary to popular belief you can scrub watercolour paper, albeit gently, but this with erratic or no sizing might disintegrate. I don't think I would risk that without trialling a scrap first.

I can try lifting, taking a stiffer brush and picking out highlights. I don't think that will work too well in this case though, for two reasons. One is the nature of the paper, and the other is the staining pigments I have used.

I can put on some calm, really relaxing music and slowly slowly build up a stronger picture than this was ever intended to be. The paper bleeds have already demanded that I change from my original idea. I can now simply follow what the paper dictates.

I think the last option is most appealing. It is Sunday, after all!

Today I am grateful for options.

the problem continues

Where there should be lovely smooth lines and variations of colour there are spidery ragged edges and pixellated forms. I am tempted to use a little scumbling (dry brush across the surfave of the paper) but I don't really like that in watercolours.
Where the shirt should be billowing the paper has sucked in the pigment with no respect at all for how it was applied!

more for me than for you

So it was a cup of tea and a dose of "never give up" rather than the beer on the couch that looked so tempting... there's still a lot to do, but I am not going to let this paper beat me!

Until this dries properly it is hard to get a good idea of how it is going. The paper is thirsty and pulls the colour down, and when it is dry it loses a lot of colour. Grrrrr... where is quality control, and how did I come to have this piece of paper?

and now,

put on some music, and it's back to the drawing board.

The wind (more than a breeze) has come up and it is pleasantly cool. I think that there is a change in the weather on its way... time to get productive again.

a dopo
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share your tears

And while I am frustrated... add some anger to it, but well directed, productive anger I hope.

Several years ago artist Sarah Scott began a project called "Share Your Tears". It was a very moving, and artistically successful project which brought a lot of pleasure and solace to many people along the way.

Blog readers may remember when she put out her first Share Your Tears book. That was back in 2008, and the project had been going for quite some time at that point.

Other committments have meant that she has painted fewer of these works recently.

UNTIL

some person who shall remain nameless (but oh how I would love to name and shame) has decided that he could steal her project all for himself. Audacious, incredible but true.

Take something successful and make it your own, forget about ethics, intellectual copyright, that's how to get ahead! It reminds me of another artist doing the same thing in another country, but we wont go there either!

I know it is hard to come up with something original, but please, PLEASE if you have been DIRECTLY influenced by another, at least acknowledge the fact! There is no shame in that.

That's as bad as having learnt everything you know from one teacher, and then made your income by presenting yourself to the world as completely self taught, selling the techniques you learned from another as your own.

But I wont go there, either. I was not the injured party in either of those cases, just a very irate bystander.

But in the case of SHARE YOUR TEARS I have a much closer interest.

HANDS OFF!!! Go and have your own wonderful ideas. How can you lie straight in bed at night? Or maybe you can't, tossing and turning because you survive by stealing ideas from brilliantly talented emerging artists you meet in the course of your work. No, I am sure you sleep well, and have no idea of how morally wrong your actions were.

WORLD please know that Share Your Tears is a project created by SARAH SCOTT and noone else.


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aaaagh...frustration plus some!

I've been working on the painting. Something I feared last night but wasn't sure about has been absolutely confirmed. This paper, Fabriano (but I can't remember which one), has been behaving in exactly the same way as my beloved Arches did when the Americans bought out the company and took short cuts. It has not been properly sized.

WHY WHY WHY take something that is NOT broken and try to fix it? Where is this paper being made? I can't believe that Fabriano would knowingly allow this to happen!

What I don't know is when and where I bought the paper.

My options: Abandon painting and cry.
Allow to dry and overwork in pencil or acrylic.
Stop and put it aside for a while and see if it still has some intrinsic value when I come back to it.

It's all very well for me to choose to waste my time, but when I have possibly wasted hours and hours of good sleep time painting something that may not be saved then that is REALLY frustrating.

My short term solution: take out a cold beer, put my feet up on the couch, and talk to the dogs. They, patient creatures who after lunch were hiding in the stairwell waiting for a walk, are not really that impressed at having the afternoon in the studio.

Today I am grateful for my love of watercolour painting.

it's 2.40am and i am just home

Tonight was the second in a series of events where I do, quite literally, paint for my supper. It is a "live art" and cuisine event, which I think goes into a TV magazine-type programme called Extragusto. The event is held at La Locanda del Castello, where I have exhibited and dined on several occasions... nice it is, with a terrace overlooking the town.

The first one, a month ago, was enjoyable enough but I was rather stunned to be interviewed and filmed. This time an email came advising us to look our best and study for interviews (was that aimed at me, I wonder?) as the film crew was returning. Now I wanted to stay home and sleep. It's one thing to have to speak off the cuff, but another thing altogether to know that you are going to be interviewed in a language you barely speak somewhere around midnight! The evening that could have been fun suddenly became a chore.

Nevertheless, I had agreed to paint for my supper, and my name was already in the list in the newspaper. It was sure to be pleasant as long as I didn't think about it too much! The event was also a wine tasting, (so much for the wagon!) and the very first wine could have been a NZ savignon blanc. When I dared to say this to the wine presenter (he asked me my opinion of the first two wines) he agreed with me! He knew all about NZ wines, particularly the white ones. That was a nice surprise, hearing NZ wines praised wholeheartedly by a Russian wine expert speaking Italian. The wines were all very good, but that one, which transported me to the other side of the world, remained my pick of the night. I can thoroughly recommend wines by Kellerei Kaltern, way up north near the Italian border.

And the painting? Here is the story so far:
All things considered, working outdoors in difficult light, lots of onlookers coming up to talk, and the threat of the film interview over me until late in the night, I am reasonably happy with the result. The producer wanted it finished in the evening but he had to be satisfied with this as the paper was far too wet to complete any details.

There are parts of it that I am very happy with. I hope they haven't changed too much by morning. The paper is a very heavy Fabriano which is quite soft and some of the staining colours have a tendency to walk when my back is turned, leaving little spidery lines just under the surface of the paper as they go!

And as for the filming, it was a much shorter interview this time. Maybe they noticed that I'm only semi-coherent once I stray from my usual topics of conversation. I have no idea where to look for it so I may never have to cringe when I hear myself trying to describe my choice of subject in Italian.

The subject is a family leaving this area when evacuated during the war. I have to paint a scene for a book cover and this is a trial piece leading up to that work.

Today I am grateful for friendly faces in difficult places.